Princess Celestia: [With her face covered in black soot, eyes spinning dizzily) "When will they learn that assassination attempts are useless against somepony who is immortal? It's going to take forever to get cleaned up again..."
Assassin: "MONKEY ON A STICK!" [Assassin teleports as far as she could to a hidden shady street corner, then pulls a mobile phone and dials a number] "About that arrangement? The deal's off! It's off do you hear?! She knows I pulled that scroll-bomb on her, and I'm not going to spend another moment in Canterlot trying to bump her off knowing she can shrug off that and then some, and can find me wherever under the Sun! I mean seriously, what was I thinking?!
[A scroll suddenly poofs into being nearby, sealed with Celestia's cutie mark. Whimpering, the assassin opens the letter, which reads:]
I take offense to that, my little pony! I'm not so vindictive as to have you hunted down and exterminated--immortal goddess or not, Equestria has laws to be followed. Yiou'll get a fair trial and hearing, and I've instructed the Guard to bring you in *unharmed*. Just relax and stay calm--I promise mercy. And if you reveal who hired you, I'll arrange for an early release, or a more comfortable incarceration; whichever is more practical.
"Your highness, please, it was nothing personal! It was just business! Look, all I can tell you is, somepony gave me a 200K deposit to take you out, with the rest of the money to be cashed in after I bump you off. But I need protection, ma'am! because I was told if I fail or refuse the offer, she says will know, and she will send assassins to come after me no matter where I am!"
"And as for who she is? She works through a lot of intermediates, but all I can get is an alias - somepony called 'Ms Heartless'."
Princess Celestia: "There we are--progress! I shall grant you protection; as of now you are a Special Witness. You'll be taken into custody, and placed under constant guard after further questioning. And as for this 'Miss Heartless'...rest assured, she won't be a problem for much longer. Now, please accompany me back to Canterlot...without fleeing in terror this time."